 |
|
|
|||||
Natalie Kerr and Jaime Kurtz are social psychologists and colleagues in the department of psychology at James Madison University. Kerrs work has been published in many academic journals, and she also writes for Psychology Today. Kurtz has also appeared in a variety of psychology journals, and previously authored The Happy Traveler, Positively Happy, and two Audible Original programs. Whats the big idea? Connecting socially has become increasingly complicated. Despite being more digitally connected than ever, our society is experiencing record-breaking loneliness. Many emerging cultural norms threaten to emotionally isolate us from one another. It is necessary for health and well-being that we practice the science-backed fundamentals of a meaningful social life. Below, coauthors Natalie and Jaime share five key insights from their new book, Our New Social Life: Science-Backed Strategies for Creating Meaningful Connection. (Listen to the audio versionread by Natalie and Jaimein the Next Big Idea App.) 1. Social connection isnt a luxury. Do you wish you had more time to spend with friends? If so, youre not alone. Surveys suggest that Americans spend less time with friends than they used to (now averaging just three hours a week!), and about half of people wish they had more time with friends. This trend can be partly attributed to our busy schedules but may also reflect shifting priorities. We have a fundamental need for social connection. We live happier, healthier, and longer lives when we have enough of it. Yet, in the modern world, we often view socializing as a luxury we can afford to live without. It can feel more like an indulgence than an essential need. When we feel pressed for time, happy hours, date nights, and brunches with friends are often the first things to go. This mindsetthat social connection is a luxury rather than an essential needcan create a barrier to social connection that we might not even be aware of. To overcome this barrier, we must remember that social connection is an essential health behavior (just as important as sleep, exercise, and good nutrition), and we need to prioritize it accordingly. Whether we consider ourselves introverts or extroverts, we must invest time, energy, and resources into relationships. 2. The norms of modern life make it hard for us to connect. Social norms are the unwritten rules for normal or acceptable behavior in a given context. In the U.S., social norms include shaking hands when greeting someone, saying please and thank you, and giving people plenty of personal space. Its good to conform to these types of social norms because they help people know what to expect during social interactions. They also help us maintain good relationships with others. However, there are other social norms that we should consider breaking. Lets consider a relatively new norm: using our phones in social settings. In a recent survey, nearly 90 percent of U.S. adults admitted to using their phone during their most recent social interaction. You can see this play out at nearly any restaurant, wedding reception, or fraternity party. Nearly 90 percent of U.S. adults admitted to using their phone during their most recent social interaction. Have you had the experience of someone repeatedly looking at their phone while youre telling them something important? Oreven worsehave you had someone reply to someone elses text message while you were talking to them? It feels crummy. Research confirms this behavior can make us feel rejected and less connected to our social partners. This behavior is also linked to increased conflict and decreased satisfaction in couples. This is just one example of how social norms can make connection difficult. Other examples include the fact that were spending more time alone. More people are living alone and working remotely. Weve also adopted busyness as a way of life, filling our schedules to the point where theres little room left for spontaneous connection. Additionally, modern parenting has become so time- and energy-intensive that many of us sacrifice our social lives to support our kids activities. These patterns are starting to feel normal, and many of us feel pressure to conform. We might even go along with these norms without even realizing it. If we want to live more connected lives, we need to start questioning and resisting some of the norms that define our modern social world. 3. Our assumptions about people are often wrong. Have you ever fretted over a social blunder you thought you committed, only to learn later that no one had noticed or cared? Have you ever felt rejected when a friend didnt return a text, only to discover they misplaced their phone? If youre like us, youve had the experience of misreading social cues. After all, making sense of other people is no easy task! We cant read minds, so we make inferences about others thoughts, feelings, and intentions. Decades of research demonstrate that our inferences are often wrong. For instance, we tend to underestimate how much others will appreciate our efforts to connect. This keeps us from striking up conversations with strangers who might eventually become friends, expressing gratitude to those weve never properly thanked, offering social support to friends in need, and performing random acts of kindness. Another example: have you ever replayed a conversation in your head, cringing at something you said? Its common for people to worry about the impression they made, but our fears are often overblown. Research shows that people tend to like us and enjoy our conversation more than we think they do. Researchers call this discrepancy the liking gap. Our faulty perceptions of other people can create a barrier to social connection. This barrier can be overcome by adopting a more positive outlook. Expect people to like you. Expect them to appreciate your gratitude, support, and kindness. Chances are, they truly will. In the rare instance that they dont, it probably had nothing to do with you. 4. Opportunities for connection are right in front of us. Many people think making friends is mysterious or determined by a persons unique attributeslike a great sense of humor or good looks. These factors do matter, but research suggests that liking is also triggered by simple, mundane factorslike how often you cross paths or how much you have in common. Overlooking these simple factors can cause you to miss out on the opportunities for connection right in front of you. The mere exposure effect applies to foods, fragrances, songs on the radio, andyespeople. One of the most overlooked factors is proximity. In the words of social psychologist Elliott Aronson, the people who are geographically nearest to you are most likely to become dearest to you s well. Theres nothing mysterious about the power of proximity. The more you see someone, the more opportunities there are to smile at one another, say hello, strike up a conversation, and discover common interests. The power of proximity is due to a very basic psychological phenomenon known as the mere exposure effect. In short, the more were exposed to something, the more we tend to like it. The mere exposure effect applies to foods, fragrances, songs on the radio, andyespeople. Put the mere exposure effect to work by just letting yourself be seen. Turn your camera on during Zoom meetings, comment on your friends social media posts, or go to the yoga studio instead of streaming a class in your living room. And try to be seen repeatedly. You could try going to the gym at the same time each day or attending the 9:00 am church service every Sunday. This increases the chances of crossing paths with the same people. Over time, youll start recognizing others, and theyll begin to recognize you, which could lead to something more. This advice is especially helpful for shy or quiet people. You dont need to be the wittiest or most outgoing person in the roomyou might just need to show up! 5. Opening up is risky, but worth it. How do you feel about deep conversations? The ones in which you admit your imperfections, share your true feelings or reveal your deepest longings. How do you feel about showing your true self in a friendship? Research suggests that many of us are reluctant to engage in these types of behaviors, but they are key to unlocking greater intimacy in relationships. Consider one study where participants engaged in shallow and deep conversations with strangers. In the shallow conversation, participants answered questions such as: How is your day going so far? In the deep conversation, participants disclosed more personal information by answering questions like: If you could undo one mistake you have made in life, what would it be, and why would you undo it? The results showed that participants expected to prefer the shallow conversation, but they actually preferred the deeper one. They felt closer to their deep conversation partner than their shallow conversation partner, and the deep conversations were a lot less awkward than participants thought they would be. When we play it safe, we might be missing out on opportunities for meaningful social connection. Natalie Kerr and Jaime Kurtz This article originally appeared in Next Big Idea Club magazine and is reprinted with permission.
Category:
E-Commerce
In a world where innovation drives success, the most valuable asset a company can secure is exceptional people. Great talent is the common denominator across all successful companies. This is particularly true in the investment industry, and always true for hedge funds. Each hedge fund is essentially a team of people betting that they have the smarts to understand the world better than any of their competitors. When aiming to consistently beat the markets, you need to be the best in the world at what you do. Success is developing an understanding and ultimately an edge that others havent cracked yet. Thats the gamezero-sum, and supercompetitive. As the deputy chief investment officer of a leading hedge fund, I am lucky to see firsthand what it takes to have any chance of being the best. We need everyone on our team to be exceptionally bright, to relentlessly challenge any consensus around them, and to be truly obsessed about what they doall while working in an intense culture of collaboration where everyone challenges each other and seeks to constantly improve. Finding talent like that is extremely tough. Bridgewater has prided itself for decades on attracting the best, but doing so requires evolution in our approach, and looking beyond traditional avenues. Outside the boxand sometimes the classroom Its common for elite companies to look to the most prestigious schools as their primary way of recruiting incoming investment classes. Bridgewater leverages this route, too, as such universities are often the home to many brilliant students. But the fact is, most of the worlds best talent is elsewhere. Many of the most brilliant and innovative thinkers come from diverse backgrounds and educational paths. My own experiences have fueled my commitment to expanding our recruiting horizons. I myself am a college dropout. And before making that choice, I remember how troubled I was by the clear disparities of opportunity I saw around me, when growing up in central Illinois. I would hear of students elsewhere having high school teachers with PhDs and receiving expensive elite standardized test tutoring. By the time I got to high school, I had become an avid participant in online communities developed to help other students, and even published an extensive SAT guide online, which helped freely spread best practices to hundreds of thousands of students across the world. Students like me. The democratization enabled by the internet not only allows for students to access otherwise unattainable resources, but it also opens up key opportunities for companies to identify the best talent. While the possibilities here are endless, Bridgewater has already begun to source candidates through Metaculus, a web-based forecasting platform. With Metaculus, we run prediction competitions, where participants leverage their abilities and grit to make logical, thoughtful predictions about what will happen in the future. This allows us to seamlessly leverage technology to tap into a vast pool of talent that extends far beyond conventional recruiting channels, allowing us to discover talent anywhere in the world. This is a deeply meritocratic approach. Last year, in our first contest, we had participation from students at over 140 schools as well as many noncampus candidates, many of whom Bridgewater had never reached with recruitment efforts before. Fifteen hundred people joined the contest,including 700undergraduate students from across the U.S. While Yale came in 134th place and Harvard finished 138th, Northwestern University topped the standings. But the overall winner was an undergraduate from Grinnell College, a private liberal arts college in Iowa. In addition to the Grinnell student, we interviewed dozens of candidates and ultimately made three internship offers from schools we have not historically recruited from. I personally interviewed those three candidates and can confidently say they were among the most exciting, promising candidates Ive ever met. This competition is only one example of the many ways that new recruitment methods through innovative technologies will level the playing field and highlight those who might otherwise be overlooked. To be best positioned moving forward, leading global companies must consider those who can raise the best ideas, regardless of the background that informs them.
Category:
E-Commerce
Want more housing market stories from Lance Lamberts ResiClub in your inbox? Subscribe to the ResiClub newsletter. Among the 26 forecasts tracked by ResiClub in its final 2025 home price forecast roundup, the average prediction is a +2.7% increase in U.S. home prices this year. Keep in mind that the above figure is a forecast for nationally aggregated home prices. On a regional and local basis, home price swings can vary greatly from the national figure. For example, on a year-over-year basis, U.S. home prices as measured by the Zillow Home Value Index are up 2.6%, while home prices in the Rochester, New York metro area are up 8.2% and home prices in the Punta Gorda, Florida metro area are down 8.3% during that same timeframe. To better understand how regional home prices may vary in 2025, ResiClub reached out to economists at Zillowwhose forecast of U.S. home prices rising by +2.9% in calendar 2025 aligns with the average modeland economists at Moodyswhose forecast of U.S. home prices falling by -0.4% in 2025 is among the most bearishto gather their metro-level home price forecasts. Lets take a look at the metro-level forecasts. Click here to view an interactive of Zillows 2025 metro area home price forecast. !function(){"use strict";window.addEventListener("message",(function(a){if(void 0!==a.data["datawrapper-height"]){var e=document.querySelectorAll("iframe");for(var t in a.data["datawrapper-height"])for(var r=0;r
Category:
E-Commerce
All news |
||||||||||||||||||
|
||||||||||||||||||