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Things are tough right now, with complexity and uncertainty in the world driving stress and worry. Youre probably trying to stay positive and muscle through. But theres an important difference between keeping appropriately optimistic and acting with toxic positivity. If youre faced with toxic positivity in yourself or others, its probably based on good intentions that have run amok. But it can actually create a negative spiral that can make things worse. Staying positive during trying times According to a survey from MyPerfectResume, people are reporting record levels of exhaustion, anxiety, and stress with 88% who said they were burned out. In addition, 32% of respondents reported they felt anxiety, including 30% who had headaches and 25% who had muscle pain related to their burnout, according to the data. Attempting to stay optimistic is a reasonable response, but toxic positivity is what happens when that goes too far. It involves ignoring reality, suppressing negative emotions, and trying to be overly positive in every situation, regardless of reality. Those with toxic positivity may also try to impose their attitudes on othersto the annoyance of those around them. Toxic positivity has multiple negative effects. First, when people demonstrate toxic positivity, it can result in denying reality, and undermining their ability to respond constructively to negative situations. Second, an unwillingness to express real emotions can result in feeling isolated from others and can cause mental health challenges for the person expressing toxic positivity. Third, when someone is acting with toxic positivity and denying others emotions, it creates barriers to forming a trusting relationship, because others may feel devalued. Fourth, when someone is perceived as inauthentic, others may question their honesty or integrityagain getting in the way of building relationships. So, how can you be positive without embracing toxic behavior? There are some strategies that work. Be aware and be realistic You can avoid toxic positivity by staying aware of whats going onincluding the bad news or challenges that emerge. Repressing or avoiding difficulties or uncomfortable facts is a classic characteristic of toxic positivity. Avoid burying your head in the sand. Instead, seek information, stay in the know, and be aware. You dont have to overdo negative thinking or marinate in bad news, but you will want to keep your eyes open to real situations and circumstances. Its also important to be realistic. You dont need to overcorrect toxic positivity by catastrophizing or anticipating all the worst outcomes, but its constructive to be clear about whats going on and face up to the need for solutions. Put energy into responding to problems instead of investing energy in sealing them out. As youre working through disappointment or discouragement with yourself or others, also avoid using insincere positive statements or gimmicks. A study published in Psychological Science found that most people believe positive statements can help their mood and their self-esteem. But in the experiment, people who struggled with low self-esteem and who also repeated positive self-statements like, Im a loveable person, felt worse than they did before using the self-statement. The bottom line: Sometimes inauthentic or superficial solutions like hollow self-talk are worse than an honest assessment of whats difficult and an intention to deal with it. Encourage and empower yourself and others, but stop short of using superficial feel-good statements that get in the way of authenticity or action. Be empathetic At the same time youre aware of situations and realities, youll also need to stay in tune with people and be empathic toward them. Consider what theyre going through, ask questions, and listen to their points of view. By validating what people are going through and by being present with them in tough times, you can both support them and empower them to work through difficulties. This is helpful to them and it also builds the relationship, which is good for both of you. Also avoid imposing your attitudes on others. If youre naturally an optimistic person, thats fine, but avoid attempting to change others. Youll want to support them, but if you try to convince someone that everything is okay despite all theyre going through, youll just irritate them and drive a wedge in the relationship. Its okay to be optimistic While youre avoiding a toxic approach to positivity, you can be optimistic. Look to the future and be hopeful about itand take action to find solutions for the issues that are important to you. Optimism can lead to positive outcomes. In a study of over 70,000 people researchers from Boston University surveyed respondents about their optimism and compared it to their health data, over a 10 to 30 year period. They found that those who were more optimistic boosted their longevity by 11% to 15% and increased their chances of living to age 85 by 50%. These effects on longevity were in spite of participants age, education, diseases, or depressionand regardless of habits related to alcohol use, exercise, or diet. Researchers believe that optimism is so powerful because it may help people bounce back from stress and regulate emotions. The difference between toxic positivity and healthy optimism is a matter of degree. If you deny reality, you may be tipping into toxic territory. But if you can be empathetic and avoid imposing your positivity on others, you reach a reasonable balance and connect more deeply with others.
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E-Commerce
In the past week, I had “conversations” with two leaders who talked too much. They were good people with interesting stories to share. But they went on for far too long while I just sat and listened. Characteristically, they asked few questions and, when they did, didn’t seem to be interested in my responses. These two leaders were engaged but seemingly not curious or fully present. These encounters crystallized something I’ve observed repeatedly in my decades of executive coaching: A damaging leadership blind spot is the simple inability to stop talking. I call this a “leadership trap” because it ensnares otherwise effective executives in a paradox: The same verbal fluency that may have helped them rise through organizational ranks becomes a liability once they arrive in positions of authority. What got them noticed now gets in their way. The drivers of excessive talking As I reflected on these two leaders, I realized they reflected a pattern I’ve seen many times. Contrary to what many might assume, their excessive talking wasn’t rooted in narcissism or self-absorption. Instead, it flowed from more complex motivations they likely didn’t even recognize. The first executive, a fast-moving consumer goods leader, seemed driven by an underlying insecurity. Despite his considerable achievements, his need to recount every detail of his company’s growth story suggested he was still seeking validation. His monologues were attempts to prove his wortha verbal résumé delivered even when no one had questioned his credentials. The second leader, a newly promoted senior vice president in healthcare, displayed what I’ve come to recognize as “the silence phobia.” Whenever our conversation reached a natural pause, she would quickly fill the gap with another anecdote. This discomfort with silence is not uncommon among leaders, who often experience momentary quiet as a vacuum that must be filled. Why leaders often talk too much In my coaching practice, I’ve identified several other drivers that cause well-intentioned leaders to monopolize conversations: Some leaders talk excessively due to underdeveloped self-awareness. They genuinely don’t realize they’re dominating discussions. Without deliberate attention to their communication patterns, these leaders never notice the subtle signs of disengagement around themthe avoided eye contact, the phones checked under the table, the contributions that gradually diminish. Others feel intense pressure to appear intelligent and in control, especially those promoted based on technical prowess rather than leadership ability. They may dive into excessive detail, not realizing that their desire to impress often achieves the opposite effect, frustrating employees who prefer clear, concise direction. The organizational cost When leaders don’t create space for others’ voices, organizations pay a steep priceoften without realizing the source of their struggles. Both leaders I met last week lead sizable teams. I couldn’t help wondering how their communication styles were affecting their organizations. Were team members experiencing the same one-sided conversations? Were valuable insights going unshared because there was simply no space to offer them? This pattern creates what I think of as “conversational quicksand.” The more leaders talk, the less others contribute. The less others contribute, the more leaders feel compelled to fill the silence. Each interaction reinforces the dynamic, gradually pulling teams deeper into passivity. The business consequences extend beyond frustrating meetings. When employee engagement diminishes, team members feel their input is neither valued nor necessary. Innovation suffers as people become less inclined to voice their opinions, knowing they’ll struggle to find space in the conversation. Perhaps most damaging, leaders who talk too much paradoxically undermine their own influence. When someone speaks at length, their key messages get lost in the verbal deluge important signals drowning in noise. Team members start tuning out, missing crucial information as they struggle to maintain focus through lengthy monologues. In exit interviews, feeling “not listened to” consistently ranks among the top reasons talented people leave organizations. The efficiency of team operations also suffers, with long-winded explanations making meetings feel like endurance exercises rather than productive gatherings. Breaking the pattern One of the most difficult challenges in helping verbose leaders change their approach is that many don’t recognize the problem. The first step toward change is typically a wake-up callobjective feedback that makes the pattern impossible to ignore. A structured 360-degree feedback process often provides this necessary reality check. One leader I worked with was genuinely shocked when his feedback revealed that team members felt “steamrolled” in meetings. For leaders ready to address this challenge, I recommend a simple but powerful practice: the “talk time” journal. After each significant meeting, they estimate the percentage of time they spent talking. One executive I coached was stunned to discover he was talking 7080% of the time in meetings explicitly called to get input from his team. The “WAIT principle”asking oneself “Why Am I Talking?” before continuing to speakoffers another practical checkpoint. This simple internal question helps leaders assess whether their contribution adds value or merely takes up space. Today’s technology offers additional support. AI-driven meeting analytics tools can monitor speaking patterns, providing objective data on who speaks and for how longa communication fitness tracker where numbers tell the truth when perception might not. Many leaders benefit from enlisting a “communication buddy”someone they trust to provide honest feedback with subtle real-time cues during meetings when the leader begins to dominate. Perhaps the most powerful technique is practicing strategic silence. By consciously pausing after asking questions and resisting the urge to fill quiet moments, leaders create space for reflection and encourage more thoughtful contributions from others. An increase in influence After my encounters last week, I reflected on a leader I’d coached several years ago. He had initially displayed the same pattern of dominating conversations but had committed to changing his approach. After six months of deliberate practice, he had reduced his talking time from approximately 60% to 30% of team meetings. The results were transformativenot just more engaged employees but also better decisions, faster execution, and ultimately stronger business results. “I used to think leadership was about having all the answers,” he told me. “Now I understand it’s about asking the right questions.” This paradoxicalresultincreased influence through decreased talkingemerges consistently in my work with leaders. When they create space for others’ voices, they not only access more diverse thinking but also elevate the significance of their own contributions. The goal isn’t to make leaders talk less just for the sake of it. Instead, it’s about helping them become more effective communicators who create environments where every voice contributes to success. When leaders master this balance, their influence increases even as their word count decreases. As I left my meetings with those two leaders last week, I wished I could offer them this insight: Your greatest impact as a leader often comes not from what you say, but from what you enable others to say. Leadership communication isn’t about holding the floorit’s about creating the conditions for collective intelligence to flourish. The next time you find yourself dominating a discussion, ask yourself: Am I talking because it’s necessary, or simply because I can? Your leadership effectiveness may depend on your answer.
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E-Commerce
The Fast Company Impact Council is an invitation-only membership community of leaders, experts, executives, and entrepreneurs who share their insights with our audience. Members pay annual dues for access to peer learning, thought leadership opportunities, events and more. Since ChatGPTs launch in 2022, it feels like artificial intelligence is finally going mainstream. From Fortune 500 board rooms to dinner tables, everyone is talking about AI, its applications, and its promise. With more than $500 billion flowing into AI infrastructure investments, many investors predict the AI wave is just gaining momentum. Those investors are right, AI still has a long way to go before it is truly ubiquitous. But more importantly, we have to tread carefully when we talk about AI going mainstream. The reality is that while many reading this article are already using AI in our daily lives, there are billions of people around the world who are a long way away from feeling AIs impacts and opportunities. So how do we truly change the world with AI? The opportunity isnt just about reach, but about the underlying data and infrastructure that will be needed to make AI a truly global technology revolution. Lessons from mobile phone adoption We can learn a lot about the promises and pitfalls of technology revolutions by looking to the past. Today, 70.5% of the worlds population uses a cellphone. Yet, its taken nearly 50 years for cellphones to gain worldwide adoption since the first mobile phone call was made in 1973 by Martin Cooper, a Motorola executive, using a prototype mobile phone. While mobile phone technology has improved significantly, with phones getting smaller and smarter over the years, the real power of mobile phones took hold with the cellular networks evolution. The 2G cellular network introduction in 2000 catapulted mobile phone usage forward and made it possible for companies like Apple to imagine the first iPhone, launched in 2007. Without significant investment and expansion in global cellular networksthe foundational infrastructure required to bring cell phone technology to every corner of the worldits possible that cell phones would never have gained popularity or market share. Biases and blind spots So, what hurdle does AI need to overcome to truly become a global technology? While many investors are looking towards power and chipsthe critical GPUs that allow AI to performthey are missing a much more important foundation: data. Large language models (LLMs)the backbone of todays AIare only as good as the data they are trained on. Unfortunately, data often comes with built-in biases and blind spots. Consider for a moment that many of the most popular LLMs have been built by U.S. companies and are trained on large, publicly available datasets using online sources like literature, news, social media, and Wikipedia. While expansive, this data is inherently influenced by Western cultural norms, political ideologies, and historical viewpoints. This is a problem if the AI product is meant to be used globally. Its a simple truth: Online data tends to reflect wealthier, tech-savvy populations that represent a very small percentage of the world population. As a result, the LLMs powering the most exciting AI are only relevant and working for English-speaking users with regular internet access, but are failing to account for the experiences and realities of the global majority. The path forward One solution is stronger AI governanceimplementing policies and procedures that actively mitigate biases in AI models and the underlying data they depend on. This has become a growing focus for policymakers and industry leaders alike, aiming to make training data more inclusive and models more reflective of diverse perspectives. Auditing systems for algorithmic fairness is one way to address this. However, relying on a handful of AI companies to self-regulate has its limitations. Arriving at an industry standard consensus can be difficult, policy adoption can be slow, and enforcement is often inconsistent. We need a broader approach. Another way forward is for companies to take matters into their own hands by pairing the depth of their own proprietary datasets and domain expertise with the breadth and processing power of existing AI models. By making a commitment to their own data management, companies across industries and regions present a huge opportunity to help improve and expand available data sets. Leveraging new, alternative sources of customer data is core to my company Talas thesis on reaching true global scaleand has enabled Tala to efficiently implement AI in its financial infrastructure. A truly global revolution One thing is clear: AI is here to stay, and its pace of development will only accelerate. But if we do not address its biases and blind spots now, we risk leaving billions of people out of the equation. There is hope that the AI industryfrom incumbents to disruptorswill recognize the global opportunity to implement AI. Companies must take proactive steps by adopting forward-thinking AI governance, while also leveraging proprietary data to fill in the gaps of the first generation of LLMs. The opportunity starts with global data and infrastructure. We are early enough in the lifecycle of AI to make sure we are building products to revolutionize the entire world, not just parts of it. Shivani Siroya is founder and CEO of Tala.
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E-Commerce
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